Archive for the ‘Feminism’ Category

How To Be a Real Bitch

Sunday, October 15th, 2006

There’s a surfeit of books out today about real men who don’t eat quiche, and real women who don’t pump gas. But there’s one area that’s been totally ignored. So let’s call a spade a spade, as it were, and shovel up our own collection of helpful tips on how to be a Real Bitch.

First of all, let’s define our terms. As any woman knows, any act of assertiveness on her part is enough to put her in this category. If a woman asks for something, she’s a bitch. If she complains (however justified the complaint), she’s a bitch. If she’s impatient, if she says ‘no’ to an unreasonable request, if she refuses to take orders without questions, she’s a bitch.

Obviously, the only way to avoid being in this category is to sit quietly with your hands folded in your lap, and be ready to jump when your boss — husband — kids speak.

However, this sort of passive behavior is well nigh impossible for any sane adult to maintain indefinitely. So let’s face facts, and accept the label as one of the results of trying to get any job done.

Stop feeling guilty, and let’s get cracking. (more…)